Thoughts of a Canary

Matisyahu - The Jewish Reggae guy The other night I went with my old and dear friend Merco to see Matisyahu in concert. To say I knew very little about the man would be an understatement: 1. I know one song he's done: "One Day". 2. I thought he was black. 3. Not only is he not black and doesn't have dreads, he's Jewish. The first thing that really struck me was how few of the words I could make out. It truly sounded like he just made sounds into the microphone and threw in some English words every once in awhile to reassure everyone that he was actually singing about something. In contrast to most reggae out there, which is a ceaseless cycle of uninspired drum beats and toneless singing, he had very creative and lively music. But again, it was pretty much instrumental to my ears. The thing that truly made a profound impression on me was what is pictured above. Towards the end of his set, Matisyahu brought a menorah onto the stage and lit it ...

When thinking about the state of America today, there are surely elements that are less than ideal. There are many issues that Americans are split on: how lax immigration laws should be, who should be able to obtain welfare, and whether Tom Brady or Peyton Manning is the better quarterback (Aaron Rodgers wins). There are, of course, other things that we can all agree upon: We hate taxes, and distrust the vast majority of the officials we have elected to lead us along with their policies. Musing about the maladies of an entire nation, one aspect of life with daily exposure is crime. Frequently we hear about people kidnapping and abusing children; we are sandbagged with stories of shootings in schools; rapes and stabbings are ubiquitous occurrences in quiet suburban neighborhoods where we least expect them to take place. Now, it is important to consider as well that we have a group of men and women whose very livelihood is to protect and serve within the confines of the law so that...

Every single one of you get out of my house  For some reason pre-ordained by a mystical being, my labor of life takes place in a bank located inside of a grocery store. While this "Inception-like" locale offers many interesting wrinkles (Imagine if it were a bank inside a grocery store inside a thrift store #mindblown), it also offers challenges.  One of the greatest challenges to my remaining sanity is the music played inside of a grocery store. It consists of about thirty songs that loop continuously. It makes you hate the songs you like and abhor the songs you hate. For some reason they also play some really creepy songs like Clay Aiken's "Invisible": " If I was invisible . Then I could just watch you in your room. " No Clay. Just no. So when Christmas season rolls around (aka November 26th to these people) you immediately get buffeted with the jolly and cloying, cacophonous and cookie-cut Christmas crap they play on the radio. You all kn...

They say "Nice guys finish last." I say that nice guys know what they want.  I realized that I have written about a great many aspects of my life. I have written about my socio-political views, my religious views here and there, my college years, my current work, etc. There's been a good amount of song dedicated to these important aspects of human life. One topic I haven't really written about is one that I find of the most foundational in the consideration of Man. So I said to myself, "Self, why have you not written about romantic relationships???" In order to rectify this obvious injustice to you, my dear readers, I laid out the groundwork for this post that you are about to read. By "laid out the groundwork" I mean "ate a frozen pizza and watched a documentary on honey badgers." I was walking out to my car the other day, and I realized that I could (either honestly or hopefully) consider myself an "eligible bachelor". This...

   W: Time to get up; you need to run.    B: 5 more minutes. You know I didn't go to sleep until late.    W: You've slept enough. Get dressed.    B: Fine, fine..........................    B: I'm dying. I need to stop. The legs are tired. The lungs can't get enough oxygen.    W: I know it's hard. Keep going. You need this.    B: What do I need to do, die?! Can't you feel my pain? This is pointless. I need to stop.    W: I know what you are going through. I know that every nerve is telling you that it can take no more. I know your lungs are desperately gasping for oxygen and your muscles are battered and torn. Keep going.    B: You have lost all reason. I'm shutting this down. You don't know what I'm going through.    W: Ever since the soul was fused to you I have been here. In every decision of the past where you persevered I was there prodding. In every achievement wherein you were crown...

"THIS ISN'T LIFE! This is stuff! And it's become more important to you than living!"  -  Kevin Spacey, American Beauty For the past couple weeks, my mind has felt like a stagnant pool. My intellect has been as if it was a being in a white room grasping at puffs of smoke that are memories and higher-faculty thoughts. Have you ever felt like that ? Like you have lost the ability to function at the level you once did ? Like you have to jumpstart your brain because you have run it aground in frivolities ? I was speaking to a friend of mine about this problem. He immediately responded that he thinks that is a growing trend. That the minds of the millennial generation have been trained to be gratified and entertained, not to retain. There is one instrument that has been able to stultify an entire generation. It is in your pocket or purse right now.   The ability to look up an answer to any question on one's smartphone is the scourge of the m...

Editor's note: I thought to let my dear friend Munson have a "celeb shot" to play Canary for a week. His mind is pretty nonsensical, so it makes for some interesting reading. If silence is golden then Munson is platinum.  -Worley      We are humans. It is in our very nature to be sociable and to engage in frequent social discourse.  There are two extreme opposites to this mean, as is the case with any behavior or activity.  An example of the aforementioned extremes would be to consider – while we are on the topic – having a conversation.  One extreme would be speaking with immense volume and with intense gesturing.  While I cannot say I have encountered this in my own life, I am sure such a conversational hazard exists because Nicolas Cage exists.  The other extreme pertains to something we have all experienced, either by accident or otherwise; the awkward silence.   And since my current job deals exclusively with people, I run into this...

You'd think people would know about the internet by now... The day of the iPhone 6 release I was working at the bank. Consumed with smoldering rage from my very cheap smartphone consistently dropping calls and location while counting on the g.p.s., I had decided to go big and go iPhone. As I was working that day, I figured I would go order the iPhone at lunch while getting a key made for my new roommate. 1:30- Got my sandwich and celery #healthyeats. Lunchtime. Time to head out to the Verizon store and hardware store. I got this. 2:30- Back to the grind. I will get the new phone and key later. That Panda Express was delicious, and now I cannot move. It's so hard to get things done in this day and age. Mostly because distractions are so prevalent that it's hard to refocus on the things that really need to be done. Do I need to get through all 8 seasons of House on Netflix? Not really because they are all basically the same. Hugh Laurie will do his thoughtf...

Have you ever noticed that someone at a get-together will always ask where someone connected to you is? For some reason it is ingrained in the casual conversation formula. It is most apparent when you have a significant other. "Where's betty at?" "She's right over there ten feet away from us, actually." In a less awkward instance that person won't actually be there and you can give her whereabouts to the person: "She's actually in Montana shepherding mountain goats." I find the latter instance is much more conducive to further conversation, as the former readily gives way to an awkward and prolonged pause. I brought that thought up to my co-worker at the bank as we were toiling away aka standing outside the branch's door desperately waiting for someone, anyone to approach us. There are times where I get a little over-eager and almost shout a jaunty "GOOD MORNING!" to someone rapidly passing by almost out of earshot. Th...