Skip to main content

Pining Away: An Expose' Of Front Royal's One Landmark

I miss it...and I LIVE here.


You've heard the name in casual conversion so many times before. You wonder to yourself, "Is it the Knotty Pine or the Naughty Pine?" as you've questioned a thousand times. It doesn't matter; you're going to go there for the first time and soak it in whether that "it" is its naughtiness or its knottiness. 

You hop in the suburban filled with 9 other hungover college kids, and make the pilgrimage to the Mecca of collegiate fine dining establishments.

As you tumble out of the car, your age old question in your mind is answered: Knotty. Shrugging off a keen sense of wistful thinking as to how cool it would be if it were the other, you step inside the hallowed doors.

All of your senses are immediately and simultaneously assailed: and you love it. You blink rapidly as to shield your eyes with lubrication from the smokey onslaught. You inhale the medley of smoke, grease, and cheap beer (no matter the hour #dedication) that exudes from all directions. The boisterous tomfoolery of bikers follows you, as you bodily cut a path through the smoke. The air is denser here.

You take your seat with your chums and await your server. The menu is chock full of delight: biscuits and gravy, $4 for double cheeseburger and fries, Country-fried steak. You're eating like a king on your 9 hours of $7 an hour work study. You smoke a pack of cigarettes, though not because you want to; because you can and because you can you feel you must.

Leaving the Pine, you reflect on what it is and what it stands for. What the Pine really is in its entirety is a rather grungy bar that you can smoke in that has cheap beer and food. What it truly means to us (that which is truly important) is the American dream. Yes, I just said that the Knotty Pine is the epitome of the American Dream.

The American Dream is, pure and simple, freedom. An unadulterated freedom which speaks to the ability to live and be able to pursue happiness. The Knotty Pine, once blessed by Willie Nelson as "the roughest bar" he'd ever been to, gives you that liberty to pursue those good times. Long after he is gone Willie Nelson will live on in tattoos that are doubtlessly on the patrons' bodies.

Like all good things in life, the Knotty Pine will kill you. I guess that's why we love it. It is the nostalgia of an age America has lost. An age where you could play Nickelback while smoking cigarettes in a bar without feeling sheepish. An age where you could love the 90s television at the bar simply by the fact that it wasn't about watching shows, games, etc, on a 200-inch, HD, 3D, monstrosity. It's about the people you're with. Love the little things, people. They're fading far too fast.

~Worley

P.S: Special thanks to B.C.M.M.C.M.C for the inspiration

Comments

  1. So many good quips in this to quote. Especially love the bit about Nickleback.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you for giving praise to a praiseworthy establishment!

    HH619

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The DMV Yelp Review

It looked pretty hoppin' .   0 Stars.      When I first went in to The DMV on Main Street, I came in with an open mind, honest. I figured that it had been around for so long, and was so established in the community, it had to be good, right? So I embarked headfirst on what turned out to be my worst experience in all my years. By the end I felt like it was managed by Nicolas Cage and employed by Oompa Loompas.      My first impression of the establishment was resoundingly positive. There was a good number of customers. This is the first thing I look for in a business. A good business has good happy patrons. The establishment was clean and polished. I approached the receptionist with an air of utmost optimism concerning service experience I was about to have. Sometimes, though, good first impressions just set you up for chaotic rides through a death valley of customer service and hope-sucking feelings of utter despair that you hope we'll not las...

Which Lord of the Rings Race Would You Be??

These go together like tobacco and tea grounds... I'm going to nerd out on this blogpost. I consider it my right since I've been so serious lately.  Consider this fair warning.  I was bubbling up with mirth as I walked onto my patio today. After a lot of running around in preparation for my new job and move out to Nova in a week, I finally had some real downtime to vegetate before writing this blog. It wasn't all roses, though; I had to figure out how not to get a scap-line (took it off) and spent two hours pondering whether this massive bumblebee hovering a foot above my head would just sting me or would rather torment me. It turns out he was my buddy, so that was nice. Naturally, I had come out to the beautiful sunshine to smoke a pipe and watch my submerged teabags turn their water into delicious tea via the power of the sun. While loading my pipe, I naturally had to come up with some subject of thought that substantiated the widely held belief that pip...